Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)
Director
Colin & Greg Strause
Writer
Shane Salerno
Cast
Steven Pasquale, Reiko Aylesworth and John Ortiz
Fox really dropped the ball on the first AVP. Sure, I wasn't expecting much but I was atleast expecting to have some fun with it... and I didn't. They pretty much crapped on both of the series and had so many inconsistencies it boggled my mind and the minds of the Alien/Predators fans from around the world. The Predators looked like a the stiff-ass Batman costume from '89, facehuggers impregnated their victims and chestbursters were born within minutes, one single Alien killing multiple Predators and it was rated PG-13! How could you make a film about one alien life-form that skins people and hangs them from trees and another that bursts out of peoples chest PG-13... it makes me wonder if they even researched the source material.
I caught the redband trailer a couple of months ago and it looked like a huge leap from the first film. More "costumed" Aliens, Predators looked like they should and gore... glorious, glorious gore. Could this be the time they get it right? Right as in I may actually have fun watching it?!
If you've seen the first film, a Predator "gives birth" to a "Predalien" (yep, that's what it's called.) The Predalien attacks everyone in the ship and crash lands in the woods of a nearby small town in Colorado. Meanwhile, a Predator is sent to clean up the mess.
The film started out well enough if not a bit rushed (not sure why since the runtime is only 86 minutes.) We get some nice scenes of acid melting a guys arm off and some little kid getting facehugged. Now I'm thinking "this is leaps and bounds better than AVP" but now we jump to scenes of a Rescue Me guy who break into places and steals stuff (?) returning to town with his sheriff friend who obviously loves his Soul Glo - "Feelin' oh-so silky smooth!" We learn about his brother who delivers pizzas and likes some really easy girl and breaks up with her asshole boyfriend and some 3rd rate Ripley wanna-be receiving an emotional reception with her husband and her 2nd rate Newt daughter. Wow... exciting.
If these scenes weren't intercut with scenes of Aliens and Predators I would've thought I was watching an entirely different film. Why am I spending so much time with these characters if they do the most cliched things, their relationships never pay off and they are still two-dimensional. I don't care for these people... actually I fucking despise them. If this is supposed to be some sort of homage to Aliens they're kidding themselves. Most of the characters in Aliens are extremely likeable despite their flaws, the people I'm watching are just annoying me with their terrible acting and awful dialogue.
There is some good though. As I stated before the Aliens and Predator look like their counterparts from their original films and the effects are pretty good (they should be since the Strause brothers are mostly effects artists.) It's good seeing the Predalien although it looks a little cheesy and it being able to produce it's own eggs in it's victims is ridiculous. A lot of the deaths scenes are really well done but if you've seen the redband trailer you've seen them all. It also includes little stuff for the fans of the originals films such as the motion radar beeping from Aliens at the begining, the infamous "Get to tha Choppa!" quote from Predator and an appearance from Ms. Yutani.
Overall a major disappointment despite the fact that the film had balls. It's worth a look for fans of both series on DVD but it's a rather disappointing theater experience. I just hope that the next AVP film will get the hell out of present day Earth and include the Colonial Marines. Bring the Colonial Marines back now! Hell, I'd be satisfied with a movie with just Aliens and Predators with no dialogue at all over this.
3.5/10
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